The Bug Birthday

Well, LR recently turned four. You know, no matter how many times I say that it still sounds impossible. Four? I would swear that we brought him home from the hospital just last week. And yet.

Not surprisingly, he likes dinosaurs, animals of all kinds, cars and trucks, and especially bugs. [Note: throughout this post I will be using the term "bugs" to refer to any and all arthropods; please do not email me to complain that butterflies, or whatever, are not "bugs"]. To be fair, he also likes letters, musical instruments, learning words in foreign languages and Dora the Explorer. But mostly, he likes creepy-crawlies. In general, if it has more than two legs, he likes it; if it has more than four legs, he loves it. My wife's general take on his interests, made after watching him at the local science museum? "He's such a boy."

It therefore comes as no surprise that this birthday will go down in our family annals as The Bug Birthday. Because that was the general theme of lots of his presents. Among other things, he got insect-themed flashcards, a variety of plastic/rubber bugs, and a butterfly pavilion. (The butterflies were great. Here's a review of the Butterfly Pavilion). He also got a bug-catcher; a small vacuum-powered device that allows you to temporarily and safely collect bugs, look at them under an attached magnifying lens, and then release them unharmed. Where were these toys when I was a kid? In any event, he didn't actually get a bug-catcher; he got two bug-catchers.

Why? Not only did we get him a bug-catcher, but so did a pair of twins in his class. (Luckily, we hadn't yet given him ours when he had his party for his friends; it was still upstairs in its very returnable box). We were pretty much floored by this gift. While it was obviously perfect, we were very surprised that another parent knew LR this well; while we're definitely friendly with the mother, we're not close.

There was, however, another possibility. About a month before LR's birthday, we went to the birthday party for these twins. As we often do, we asked LR what we should buy them for gifts figuring that he knows them much better than we do. This time, however, we were a bit concerned about his suggestion. Okay, it was more of a clamorous demand than a suggestion, but you get the idea. He had suggested that we get them both a Band in a Bucket. Not only would that gift clearly violate the Noisy Gift Rule, but one of the twins has a profound hearing loss and we were concerned about the propriety of such a gift without knowing the girl better than we did. LR was insistent, however, and we reluctantly gave in.

We therefore didn't know if the bug-catcher was a great gift, or if it was intended to be payback for our Noisy Gift violation. Having no shame, I decided to ask the mother directly. We ended up having a great laugh over the whole thing. LR was right (of course). Her daughter loves music; even when she can't hear it she can feel it and she loves to play. She also had no problem with the noise factor. When I asked how she knew about my son's love of bugs, she explained that she used the same method for buying presents that we do; she asks her kids. Both of her children had insisted that she buy LR something "bug-ish." In fact, they had wanted to get him a mechanical tarantula but she had put her foot down; she just couldn't do that to my wife.

Even though everything worked out so well, I still can't help wondering. Is this really what I want my son known for? Bugs? Really??

A Parent's Perspective

LR has always had a great ear (naming instruments used in a song, getting word pronunciations in English and in other languages exactly right, etc.), and he's always enjoyed making music. But up until very recently he refused to sing or play music in unison with anyone else, nor did he ever show any real interest in trying to play a tune with any of his instruments. Now, I never expected anything elaborate nor do I even know that other three-year-olds like to do so; I'm just saying he never did it.

So, I was very pleasantly surprised the other day when he began playing Frère Jacques the other day on his rhythm sticks. I was particularly impressed that I recognized it without him having to tell me what it was. We played it together for a while and he just kept improving. Of course, once Mommy got home he was no longer interested in showing off. At least, not right then.

The next morning, a weekend, my wife was awakened by the lovely sound of our son playing a recognizable version of Frère Jacques.....on his cymbals. Once she calmed down from her three-foot jump into the air, she told him what a great job he was doing (what a trooper). Like any good mother, she promptly told a number of friends about his accomplishment. One of these friends, obviously a parent of young ones herself, quickly wrote back and got right to the heart of the matter:

"What in the world could you possibly have done to someone that ticked them off enough that they gave your son cymbals?!?"